#I too have shit taste in men
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#‘she loves old people and these guys are fascinating’#it’s just the peak of comedy to me that she was ina relationship with mick before Pacino#that’s commitment#commitment to what exactly I’m not sure. but it’s commitment#I too have shit taste in men#but I’m not jumping every hot 70 year old in a le coq sportif jacket I walk past in marseille
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one of the reasons i didn't accept being trans sooner is because i'd look at the cishet men i know and at how they treat women in their lives, at how fucking vile they can get and how casual they are about being blatantly misogynistic, how there are usually absolutely no repercussions for any of it, and i'd think to myself "if this is what being a man is about then i don't want to be one". eventually i'd figure out that no, this isn't what being a man is about, it's just something a lot of them perpetuate, it's not inherent, you don't have to be That. so seeing other trans men who, generally speaking, should've had somewhat similar experiences, come out of it on the opposite end where they gleefully grab onto transmisogyny and have fun with it and feel justified and righteous perpetuating it is fucking baffling
#this is very subjective of course but still#all this talk about “”female socialization“” and for what? it's just an excuse to be blatantly transmisogynistic and nothing else#what about experiencing misogyny yourself and seeing it happen over and over and over and not wanting to be a perpetrator of that#how do you see all this shit and then come out of it wanting to target not just women but the most vulnerable group of women too#did you see cis men getting away with it every time and wanted to have a taste of that#with your fancy little “i'm trans tho” shield and a bunch of transphobic excuses why being mean to transfems is fine actually#transmisogyny#<- for blacklisting purposes but if more people than i intend see it then whatever ig#benvey tag
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Inspired by that time an ex-mutual of mine said Percy is 'manly'
#i have NEVER been able to take that shit seriously even back when we were friends like was she FR???????PERCY JACKSON???'MANLY'?????????????#my sister in christ he is literally a femme even when he's a cis dude and when she's a tgirl she's a full on disney princess in every way#she was femme too but painfully cis and her taste in men made my transmasc genderfluid ass balk#being a bi girl who's femme4femme in fandom spaces is actual hell LET ME AND MY MALE F/OS OUTTA HERE!!!!#percy jackson#transfem percy jackson#bigender percy jackson#trans percy jackson#feminine percy jackson#punk!percy#or#pastel punk percy jackson#depending on my mood#autistic percy jackson#bi percy jackson#demi percy jackson#team parent percy jackson#percy jackson x reader#perlex#perclana#riverson#persara#real self shipping hours#💌#summerposting#summeredits
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god the way i forgot for like 7 and a half episodes that this is a marvel show...... i am both dissapointed and surprised, which shoud never really be a combo. Also ghost agatha was bad simply bc it didn't let me appreacite kathryn being an apathetic b*tch in all its glory
#agatha all along#i like evil women i do i just...needed them to focus more on that then? like not spell it out but show a bit of why agatha basically put on#a show for the most recent coven and all the seemingly redeeming qualities were just either a smokescreen#or actually her starting to give a shit but then pulling back at the last minute#also not to gender shit but it leaves a sour taste having the only ppl she cares about be men. like. really? the only one she gave a damn#about is just billy? not alice who died protecting her? not lilia who she kinda respected??#(and i liked the agatha billy relationship. the woman lost a son and the boy lost a mom. im a SUCKER for platonic/familial shit.#at least in the first part. that also got 'resolved' incredibly quickly and unsatisfyngly)#like it was TOO much of a 180. make it make sense in either way#shes been a mass murderer all along bc she derives pleasure from it or its the way shes learnt to survive#and grew apathetic at some point#but commit to it??#dont have the entire back half of the series be about billy#they can both be a lame gay witch duo in vision whatever or something#i have so MANY THOUGHTS#anyway im just gonna make up my own ending after the first half of ep8#agatha harkness#like my complaints dont even really focus on agathario which was also...conflicting (i do love the toxic yuri side of it)#just. like. develop your MAIN FUCKING CHARACTER BETTER gdi#mt#mcu
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I never got too deep into enstars but there are days where I miss Mama 😔
#no one should ever be surprised that I main Boothill >:( /silly#yeehaw partner /jjjjjjjjj#i also like eichi for the aesthetic. he's like if you mix dain's face and ayato's mindset. actual warcriminal emperor-#and i think in terms of singing kaito slays 🔥🔥🔥🔥 I'm sorry.#actually in terms of songs in general imho it's valkyrie and akatsuki HAHAHAH#then idk i think i vibe with most undead songs though i wish there were like valentine eve's nightmare-#PERFECTLY-IMPERFECT 🔥🔥🔥🔥#fORBIDDEN RAIN- okay ill#stfu abt undead songs HAHAH#me typing these tags just slowly but surely reminds me I actually very much enjoy adonis' voice#in terms of trauma I think I got it most from Eden songs HAHAHAHHA the fricking apocalypse dance shit i forgot name but THAT#i love how i went “oh i like undead too but not as much i guess” and then proceeded to talk about undead songs more than akatsuki#and valkyrie HAHAHAHHA I'm a fricking liar#HEY HEY i mostly like valkyrie cuz shu's voice is mesmerizing- and every song in akatsuki slays because of their vocals even if I'm not th#e biggest fan of their genre leave me alone my biggest taste in men depends on their voice 😭😭😭😭😭#though in terms of friendship MaM/DoubleFace CrazyB and alkaloid for sure we'd be friends absolutely-#i played the music!! one not the original and nothing got me as hyped in the story as the fricking crazy roulette HAHAHAHA#GOT ME FEELIN LIKE I WAS IN THE CONCERT#never be a loooooSAAAAAUURRRRR *breakdances*#kiss of life is also mwah they're all my children. i know nothing on properly playing this game but i know i tried to main the christian guy#produce? forgot name but HIM I also love his voice and I have one of his priest card so he fricking dances with the priest uniform HAHAHAH#random confession: i don't have a 5 star mama card. orz.#anyways back to regular chaos in the tags omg aira i remember him what a mood and also the phantom oh frick forgot his name but i have his#sanrio card HAHAHHA 😭😭 i haven't leveled it up. i don't play this religiously-#the grind feels so overwhelming and i understand nothing I'm still on the work task 2 thing HAHHAA 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#most importantly i want to mention my redhead son i forgot his name but i love him very much my pretty son and his chaotic older bro i#support them both amen#as for fine. i don't really like most their songs that much...? okay this time I'm not lying like with Undead HAHAHAH I do vibe with#tempest nights for SURE absolute bop my dear blue haired clown is my fave fine member (as you can tell i love my loud girlies HAHAHHA)#most knight songs are bops and I like all the members- specially mister ensemble stRaws musiC (my other red haired son)
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i think its very funny that like my taste in men were clearly fucked up since the beginning because why did 8 years old me saw nightcrawler and went 'i want to hold him in my arms' bcuz my dude is objectively not pretty
#rambles 🧸#i ... still want to hold him in my arms tho#8 years old me wanted to bone like . half the xmen cast tbh#and now i still want too#but i know i have shit / weird tastes in men soo#also ?? why is nightcrawler in the comic is such a pretty boy ?????? its craaazy#i rlly need to read the comics
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Substance, Shadow, and Spirit [remixed, abridged] by Tao Yuanming
#liv in the replies#patrice bergeron#boston bruins#brad marchand#do you ever think about how brad marchand said that when bergy retired he would retire or are you capable of normal thought i'm not at all#please say a gratitude for both my sanity& y'all that this poem (which has been saved in my camera roll with the vague idea of using it for#??? long) & not one of the poems i had saved for carey for a really long time & remixed & everything with another poem until i found a poem#that absolutely murdered me in cold blood but there is an alternate universe where i did& then had to explain my unhinged thoughts to you.#anyway how are we feeling about bergy retirement. pspspspsp sara & luna are y'all doing okay like. the doc title for this one was#patrice the hockey player means a lot to me but patrice the person means so much more#which is why the end line of the other poem was so *%"@^)! (you love / what you are) because patrice does. like he is a whole ass good huma#& now since no one asked i need to tell you all the details about everything also y'all please clap i made an edit with NO baby pictures#although i did find one & save it & minimal genres of photo i always use in edits because they're my taste & aesthetic but anyway.#when i saved the first photo and marked it as one i wanted i accidentally wrote “how will he know they love him” which is not the line but#makes me feel feral about patrice & the rest of them all had hurtful names too but also. the third picture is literally a CELLY like brad#just scored a goal & he is clinging to bergy for dear life with that shit i saved that as “oh the agony on his face for unendurable”#& yes it is one of my cliches to have a draft day picture but in my defense the lifelong bond that patrice has/d with boston deserved to be#there even if i put in the love story & YES that picture is from the 2011 playoff right below it shared joy & pain & i couldn't tell you#when the brad marchy photo for together forever is except for the fact that i saw it & just the gut punch of oh my god the way he looks at#things men will praise you for is the stanley cup. duh. but i love the contrast of “some deed” being the stanley cup but then#bergy's choice to do noble deeds (ends up still earning praise &that's my note to his efforts outside of hockey we love a supportive captai#should also mention the first two i came up with & had the photos i knew i wanted for were the first and last one alskaldk but i KNEW i#wanted chara somewhere in the paragraph about leaving & then while i was looking found the one of bergy playing tuukka on accident & yes#i do have to make goalie jokes every time. no reprieve . no dice/no deal/no goal goalies have no rest/reprieve etc etc the one that killed#me though was looking for a patrice award pic & i wanted basically the one that i got for “how will you know any will praise you” & instead#also got the picture of patrice winning the some community hero award for charity work that he does & i love him mama & of COURSE that puck#is from bergy's 1000 game who do you think I am (if you guessed sleepy and emotional about patrice you'd be right) and ALSO please be ready#for all the patrice posts/bruins posts that have been sitting in my drafts to be released on this occasion of patrice retirement#I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT TUUKKA ALSO RETIRED THAT’S WHY HE WAS ON WISE OR SIMPLE NO REPRIEVE AND THAT LATE OR SOON WAS ALWAYS GOING TO BE#CHARA BECAUSE CHARA LEFT FIRST TO GO TO THE CAPS AND THEN LEFT IN RETIRMENT HE LEFT SOON BUT NOT FOR REAL THEN LATER LEFT FOR REAL (RETIRED)
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Looks like I just lost another close friend to guy who isn't worth a pile of dog shit. 😊
#my best friend no less#i cried about this shit practically all afternoon but i'm all out of tears and now i'm just pissed off.#this shit has been going on for a long ass time but i've finally reached my breaking point with it#i love her#but she is delusional#and it kills me to say that#but that whole “relationship” (if you even want to call it that) is fake. all he cares about is money not her#the worst part is that she knows it too#oh but she “loves him” and “wants to give him one last chance” girl what the fuck?#oh but better yet he dumped her once 2 years ago already and i've hated his punk ass since#never should've gotten back tother after that and i told her as much even back then#all he does is make her cry#not do anything arount their town house#and sit on his ass and watch tv or sleep when he's not working#that's the tame stuff too i could say sooo much worse but i'm actually not trying to air her dirty laundry out her#i'm just pissed off#but suddenly IM the bad guy when tell her i won't support her or this “relationship” when she told me they were getting back together today#this is after i helped her and her parents ans brother move all her stuff out of the town house last Monday and back to her parents place#after she told me they were done for good#but IM the bad guy for bringing up all of fhe reasons listed above and all of the REALLY bad things about the relationship#when i tell her i won't be supporting her any longer and that i'll be walking away if she goes back to him#best part is her family agrees with me and they tell her all the things i say about him and then some#but when i go out on the line and put my heart down on the table for her and all i get back is a text saying:#“i don't really like how you're texting right now so we'll talk about this later.”#girl#i don't know whether or not i want to cry harder or strangle her#i think it's both#so yeah i think i just lost my best friend to a guy who doesn't remotly deserve her and everything kicks rocks rn#it's just like my other friend all over again#why do my friend have such dog shit taste in men
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dc is doing a little mini relaunch after the current crossover finishes and honestly thank god because literally only two of their current ongoings interest me but there's a bunch of fun looking stuff happening in november that i might actually look at. and also it's starting series for several guys who should have had ongoings this whole time like the fucking JUSTICE LEAGUE
#i.e. black lightning JSA question batgirl. and i'll keep up with justice league now that they actually HAVE an ongoing#insane that it just wasn't happening for so long. why did they do that.#now i might actually take an interest in the mainline crossovers if there's a series that they're actually building from#then again. if it's crap i probably won't stick with it#but like marvel has three avengers books running concurrently CONSTANTLY. and yet dc hardly ever has justice league stuff going on#a team book is just. the obvious place to do all that stuff. cos i'm not reading batman i do not CARE about batman#but the new justice league has flash and black lightning and martian manhunter and other guys who i think are cool outside the Trinity guys#also i'm thinking i'll have a look at the 'absolute' universe. yes we are pointing and laughing at the batman design but it seems like an#interesting concept. and also extremely funny that they're going oh fuck marvel relaunched ultimates we have to do something like that too#but actually looking at the ACTUAL premise of the thing. it's more about making an extremely stripped back version of each character#designed to be at their lowest with no support systems in place#idk how it'll turn out. might be too edgy and angst filled for my tastes.#but it looks worth a look#for the record the two series i'm actually readign currently are poison ivy and the flash.#flash i'm actually collecting (i got in when it started and am yet to be disappointed)#lily dot tee ex tee#my pull list is getting so long. and my actual pull list of comics i'm buying is getting a bit much too#but i do not regret impulse subscribing to The Power Fantasy having just read issue 1. it's INCREDIBLE.#i've stopped getting ultimate x men tho. was good but i don't think really worth the money of getting it physically. i'll just pirate.#and tbh the current dr who run is eh. and also only a 4 issue limited series. but it's dr who comics of course i'm collecting it anyway.#immortal thor is a thousand times worth the money tho holy SHIT that book is SO GOOD and i'm SO GLAD i'm reading it physically#sorry i don't comicspost often but i had. a lot of thoughts.
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Personally of the belief that live action fans who go onto animanga posts uninvited like 'I DESPERATELY NEED YOU TO KNOW THAT I THINK THE ART STYLE IS UGLY EVEN THO THIS OPINION IS IRRELEVANT TO THE POST' should be hit with a big rock. We already moved past this ten years ago, get with it or get lost. Swallow the hunger inside of you that demands everything be palatable to you. Maybe you could stand to be a little uncomfortable for a while
#Keep ur trashy comments to yourself#It's not even ugly! It's just not the conventional anime style so you deem it ugly. That's so fucking sad of you#You're the type of person who sees a piece of art and is like OMG WERE THEY ON DRUGS?!?!?!?!?!#Idk I think the art style is very fitting for the gigantic world Oda has built#People are allowed to be ''ugly'' because not all of us were born to be models. Shock and horror I know#(this is NOT aimed at the ppl who critque the way Oda draws women (to a degree...) bc I agree he could've done the same for women as he doe#The men by giving them way more diverse features and body shapes)#No this is aimed at the ppl who think the style as a whole is ugly and demean it bc it doesn't suit their tastes#Meanwhile their taste is the most conventional cookie cutter bland pretty boy/girl bullshit out there#(I say to a degree up there bc I think ppl go way too far with the criticisms like the one person who posted the Charlotte family identical#Sisters and went LOOK HOW SIMILAR THESE WOMEN ARE ODA SUCKS when they were MEANT to look similar)#^ yes that is an actual post I saw in like 2018 or 2019 when WCI was reaching its end in the anime and it made me die laughing#There are dozens of other examples you could've given but no. You intentionally chose the triplets (quintuplets? It's been a hot minute)#Rebecca and Nami and Vivi and Shirahoshi all having the exact same face with different hair? No I will use the identical twins as proof#What a unique way to undermine your own argument bc I was with you up until that#Anyway yeah the more I think abt the more I think the live action sucks actually for getting rid of Sanji's eyebrows bc they'd 'look bad'#Who cares? It's part of his design. You are cutting off parts of his character. Same w/ Usopp's nose.#Who fucking cares if it would have looked 'bad' or 'ugly'? Is that all you guys really care about? Keeping up appearances???#I'm so sick of the shit I like getting 'remade' to appeal to people who will never actually appreciate why stuff looks the way it does#It's so shallow I hate it#<- yes I'm still bitter about what they did to my boy WW in the three guns reboot iykyk#And Livio and Razlo for that matter. What the FUCK was that about#Idk maybe it's cuz it's something I recognized in myself and attempted to squash so it's frustrating seeing other ppl do it#And again obvs Oda isn't perfect w/ this either as he draws evil women as fat old hags and his protags as skinny and beautiful#Or how he thinks not following ur dreams will make u ugly and fat and following ur dreams will make u conventionally attractive#I get it. Storytelling method. But u can do better. Use colorschemes instead of physical attributes or something like Veneer does
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I miss my awful dogs (fictional) ((the dungeater and seluvis))
#mad scrawl#'what is wrong with you' welllll elden ring is like a dating sim for me#of awful evil men#FUCK gideon belongs here too. he's the worst#and varre#I have shit taste here's all of my evil HORRID husbands!#I'm definitely forgetting someone- SHABRIRI
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"Hey Jangles I respect your media opinions can you recommend me some ways to get into Batman comics that aren't a complete non-Euclidean nightmare since I'm sure I can't just coast off Dini and Timm's cartoons forever?"
...And other questions I now regret asking.
#Batman#DC Comics#Frank Miller#this started with finding out I'd never read Watchmen and it only devolved from there by the way#also read The Long Halloween it's one of the best comics I've ever read period#and while I will not defend criticisms of Frank Miller I will also not apologize to the CoH Homecoming servers#you people were boring and had boring taste in cape story concepts and I stand by that#which is what I mean by the “in defense of The Boys (comic)” thing#The Boys is NOT a good comic and Ennis was unfortunately an edgelord who got into industry too late for it to be subversive#but it does raise some good points and commentary if in a very rude way and that's why I think it's still worth reading#also because I KNOW that Amazon isn't going to have the balls to do the G-Men shit remotely right#Discord shitposting#croak.txt#long post
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my head hurts, im bleeding still (more so than before i called ny clinic), im so stressed i want to cry cause i have no support and so much to do and all i want is my person cause everyone is in christmas mode and i cant handle this time of year alone again
#i never leave the house becuase its too exhausting and painful so i never get the chance to meet people#and theres nothing to do here and i swear this is the city of the worlds ugliest men anyway#so theres no reason to leave#and i cant use dating apps cause im trans and the only one thats actually decent to trans people isnt popular#and again some of yall are just the most boring people alive id rather kill myself than subject myself to that#like genuinely i cant fathom how these people are so average and so ugly all at once and all seem to have the same personality#like great okay i like dnd too but why is it your only personality trait#maybe your life isnt as empty as mine but its definitely not interesting either#like...i just want my one person#at this point thats all i want in life anyway cause nothing else is worth the effort#and instead i have to watch so many ungrateful people get what i desperately need#honestly do aby of you know what its like to have no idea when the next time if youll get to kiss someone?#youll get to like someone enough to want to?#but have no idea if or when itll happen when every atom of you feel likes its being ripped apart from want and need and#a history that hates you and your own body being unreliable and in pain?#i want to throw up over it all i cant do this any more and im sick to death of all of you who brag about shit you dont deserve#you had your taste of goodness sit down shut the fuck up and let some of the rest of us whove never had anything get a taste too
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😫🍳✨Give me all three for all three DA blorbos 😌
Oh no these are super cute ;A; thank you dear!!!
😫 - How does your muse handle a family member being stressed out? What about sick?
Ela: Whenever her brother was sick she was ready to spend the night in his room with comfort food and a book on some epic journey ready to be devoured. And when he was stressed out, she distracted him by organizing small trips in the countryside to just chill and exercise with the sword. Visits to the burg were a big thing too! She's a person that prefers to comfort you how she would like to be comforted rather than trying to do something out of her reach.
Hawke: He's an active listener, so he's asking what would they need first before acting on it. Mother is stressed out? Her room would magically turn into a florist laboratory. Carver is sick? Warm bath with bubbles plus his favorite magazines will appear instantly. Also these. He can handle other people's distress quite well, since he's a chill guy.
Ankh: Oh she is the one that is stressed! In a good way tho, because she's a provider and has many resources. She would be the one googling symptoms, actually, but she won't tell you about that article on autoimmune diseases that just matches perfectly with your illness. She's that considerate u-u She'd stay with her loved ones as long as she can, providing everything that's necessary to ease their suffering. And if they're exceptionally stressed, she can either offer a joke to de-escalate or an ear to listen. Among all three, she would be the most worried, so she'd check on her loved ones often.
🍳 - What kind of family gatherings does your muse prefer and why?
Ela: Considering her family gatherings were huge dinner parties with lot of protocols to be respected literally, mentioning a date for some event crushes her soul. She loathes big events, but she's okay with group activities so if a big gathering happens you can find her at the archery spot embarassing herself with her most beloved.
Hawke: He's okay with everything, really, but the more the merrier, especially if the family involved is his Kirkwall crew.
Ankh: As long as there's some drama to be discussed, or to be watched, she's there, and family gatherings are the epicenter of some major drama she would hate to miss! She'd probably listen to other's preferences before organizing things tho - read as Cullen is an introvert and she prefers to put his comfort first. They can totally hide behind a column to eat berries from a napkin and she would be the happiest.
✨ - How important is family to your muse?
I would say that the three of them care deeply about their respective families / found families and they would totally love to be part of their respective cliques too?? Ankh discussing politics and lore with Merrill and Velanna? Chef kiss. Hawke fangirling over Dorian's studies on necromancy and time magic alongside Morrigan? Prepare popcorns. Ela and Bull demolishing a small building with Isabela just because? 10/10.
The ask meme
#long post#family headcanons#elanor cousland#kerry#ankh#also here I say it and here I deny it#ela got a huge 'oh shit I'm into that?' moment when dark souls boss lav just straight up told her that gaspard was put in power as a tool#but like#ankh in general makes her head go 'wait what' so it was probably just confusion - it wasn't.#I would say they have the same taste in men but ela would literally fuck a barstool so let's just avoid to indulge with that comparison lma#but... I mean... some of ankh's partners really had the personality of a barstool so... *gestures confusely*#and that's a thing they both have in common with hawke too so#let's add a 'bonding over barstools' in their connections page#a note I know that I'll regret retroactively
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thinking about the time i was criticizing a male fantasy author for not including many female characters (and all but one were incredibly generic) and people were really like "be nice to the author, he's said he doesn't know many women in real life :/" like. yeah i can tell
#mine#delete later#cause im not trying to start shit#it was on tiktok so like all of that tracks lmao. i dont know if that's even true but if so. INSANE.#idk what made me think of this#but my dude if youre in your 40s thats not an excuse#tbh i feel like the book in question would have been completely forgettable and id just kind of roll my eyes and move on#if not for the fact that people whose taste i trust!!!!! recommended it!!!!#like what the fuck. the betrayal#like im still driving myself crazy thinking about it years later and trying to figure out what i'm missing#honestly could not say if the rest of the book was good bc imo the way the narration treated the female characters was too distracting#'this one is Mom. that's her whole personality.'#'this one is the hot older woman but she likes me anyway bc im the specialest smartest boy in school.#it's weird cause there's barely any women at this school anyway. she even tried to seduce me but im too in love with Main Love Interest'#'this one is the Main Love Interest and she's so pretty and sexy everyone wants to be with her. she has a tragic secret past#she wont tell me why but we cant be together and she also spends most of the book seducing other men. But I Know She Doesnt Mean It#i will learn her secret and wear her down so we can be together because we vibed pretty well a few years ago'#and then there's the cRaZy OnE#and that's it. those are the only female characters#apparently the last one has gotten her own book. maybe that's what people praise this guy for? but i am not willing to give it a chance lol#p****** r******* meet me in the pit
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#YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT LOSERBOYS. . .
ʚɞ summary. jjk men as different types of losers with a girlfriend who's way out of their league! but never fear, they have a few tricks up their sleeves yet. . . ft. gojo, geto, toji, choso + sukuna.
warnings. fem!reader, penetration (p in v), fingering, squirting, oral (f receiving), doggystyle, semi-public sex in geto's, virginity loss + premature ejac in choso's, drug use in sukuna's, 18+ minors dni.
a/n. 500 followers special post <3 digimon!gojo inspired by this fic by @/blkkizzat. go check it out!
SATORU GOJO — THE DIGIMON NERD!
your boyfriend satoru gojo is absolutely, undeniably, irrevocably obsessed with all things digimon.
his entire room is brimming with posters, heinously overpriced collectable toys, you name it. hell, even his bedcovers are digimon themed (and he won't change them no matter how many times you ask, either.)
to make matters worse, it's all he talks about, too. at any given moment he finds manages to find some way to connect anything in his direct line of sight to digimon; and once he starts ranting about it, it's practically impossible to get him to stop.
so, with all of these incriminating facts piling up about just how much of a loser your boyfriend is, you might be left wondering… why exactly are you still with him?
and well, the answer to that is much simpler than you'd expect — satoru gojo is a god in the sheets. and no, that's not an exaggeration.
when you first started dating, you assumed he would be mediocre at best, and that you'd probably have to teach him a few things here and there. because a man so painfully nerdy couldn't possibly know how to satisfy you from the get-go, right?
wrong.
despite previously confiding in you that he was a virgin before you went any further than making out, satoru appeared to know exactly what he was doing once he got you in his bed after a few weeks of dating.
you hadn't been too into it at first, purely due to the fact you were seemingly about to have sex with him for the first time sprawled atop his digimon bedsheets.
i mean, talk about a turn-off, huh?
but you quickly forgot about such insignificant details like that once the two of you started to venture past kissing, satoru's eager hands roaming all over your body with a level of excitement you'd only ever seen on him before when he was gushing about an upcoming digimon game.
and after he'd stripped you of your clothes? all bets were off.
"s-shit. so pretty, baby," satoru groaned as he buried his face between the valley of your breasts, licking and sucking at every patch of supple skin he could reach in the process. "so soft."
"toruuu," you mewled out, running a hand through his messy white locks and lightly scratching his scalp with your recently manicured nails as a form of silent encouragement. "feels good."
satoru visibly preens under your praising words, his face lighting up like a kid on christmas morning as he pops one of your nipples into his mouth, suckling on the perked bud like a newborn.
this gets you to release a moan, the sound so hot and so real, unlike the overdramatic sounds satoru had heard on the various porn videos he'd watched before to practise for this moment.
and the effect it had on him was clear.
within moments, your boyfriend's pretty face was buried between your legs, his tongue just ruthless as it lapped and slurped at your sopping folds. he didn't have a technique, really. he was just hungry. hungry for you (and your sweet cunt.)
"ah! s-slow down, toru— fuck!" you cried helplessly, your thighs clamping shut around his head as he continued to vigorously devour you. he found your clit so inhumanly fast, and his hot mouth was latched on to the puffy little bud like his life depended on it.
"sorry, sweet girl, can't." satoru whined quietly against your flesh, his voice muffled between each desperate lick of his tongue. "tastes too good."
you can't remember the last time a partner ate you out this good. most of your previous flings didn't even like doing it at all — maybe even considered it a chore. but not satoru gojo.
maybe loserboys just do it best after all.
he had you falling apart in record time, your orgasm washing over you like a tidal wave as your entire body convulsed against the sheets. you vaguely registered satoru talking you through it somewhere nearby, but your vision was too pleasantly hazy to make him out.
"you're so fuckin' sexy when you cum. god, i need to be inside you." satoru groaned wantonly, hastily shoving his sweatpants down his hips in one swift movement and revealing his considerably tented boxers, already darkened with a patch of pre-cum.
wait, hold on a minute...
"you have digimon boxers too? seriously, sato— oh."
oh, indeed.
satoru grinned smugly, both rows of his pearly whites on full display as he observed the way your words trailed off when he shucked his boxers and allowed his throbbing, obscenely long cock to slap against his stomach.
"ready, baby?" he chuckled pridefully, pumping his leaking dick with his fist a few times just to see the way your widened eyes followed the movement. "for your next orgasm, i wanna make you squirt."
SUGURU GETO — THE SCHOOL LIBRARIAN!
no one knew quite how it had happened — how you, the popular captain of the cheerleading team, ended up dating suguru geto, the quiet school librarian who spent most of his time meticulously organizing bookshelves.
but however it may have come to pass, being with suguru has changed your life for the better (in multiple ways). he's sweet, considerate, and despite how much he enjoys ranting about vintage russian literature, still makes an effort to be interested in your hobbies too.
oh, and also, he's the best lay you've ever had.
you wouldn't know it by looking at him; the reserved boy who always wears knitted sweaters and a pair of dark-framed glasses, but saying suguru geto knows a thing or two about how to pleasure another person would be a severe understatement.
and that's why he currently has you splayed across one of the desks at the very back of the library, legs spread wide and cheerleading skirt bunched up above your waist while he fingers you like a damn expert.
"you like that, baby?" suguru coos as he brushes some sweaty hair behind your ear with his free hand, the other still occupied with being knuckles-deep inside your dripping cunt.
"y-yeahh, sugu." you keen in response, hips weakly bucking up into his hand in search of more friction. you always got like this after a long cheerleading practise, body tightly wound up and in need of release which your boyfriend was more than happy to supply.
suguru smiles at this, his lips pulling up in a way that makes him look like the cat who got the canary as he continues to thrust his fingers up into your gummy walls, effortlessly locating that sweet, spongy spot deep inside of you.
"a-ah! right there. right theree." you cry softly, gripping onto the edges of the wooden desk for dear life as he pleasures you like it's his only purpose in life, your entire body jostling with the sheer force of each of his movements.
he chuckles deeply at your wantonness, the way his thumb gently caresses your flushed cheek creating an ironic contrast to the way his fingers pick up in pace, curling in a way he knows will drive you crazy. "mhm. right here, pretty?"
a strangled squeal escapes your lips as the tips of his digits rub against your sensitive g spot, your hips now moving more desperately against his hand as if you're not even in control of them anymore. "yes, yes, yes!"
it's not long before you're falling apart, spraying the entire desk with your translucent juices while your boyfriend croons sweet praises against the shell of your ear and tenderly strokes through the back of your hair.
"now. . . are you going to be good girl and keep quiet for me?" suguru purrs in that deep, velvety tone of his as he unbuckles his belt while admiring your fucked-out expression. "can't have anyone else hearing your pretty moans while i'm pounding you into the bookshelf, hmm?"
it never fails to surprise you how quickly he can switch up, from kind and encouraging to firm and demanding in a matter of moments. however, it doesn't bother you in the slightest — in fact, you can't help but adore how much it keeps you on your toes.
however, it goes without saying that you don't keep very quiet at all once suguru is mercilessly shoving his thick cock into your quivering pussy from behind, squashing your face against the spines of the books in front of you with each rough thrust.
shaking his head fondly, suguru ends up having to clamp a hand over your mouth in an attempt to muffle your obscenely loud sounds just in case any other students happen to stumble into the library.
maybe the old saying was right after all; it's always the quietest boys who make you scream the loudest.
TOJI FUSHIGURO — THE JOBLESS BUM!
technically, toji fushiguro can't even be classified as a loserboy anymore. after all, he's a fully grown man now (but still has nothing to show for it.)
he's more than a decade older than you and yet somehow you're the one in the relationship who's employed; if he wasn't dating you, he probably wouldn't even be able to afford food for himself, as pathetic as that sounds.
not to mention, he definitely didn't think things through when choosing to date you of all people. saying you're out of his league would be a severe understatement — you're young, pretty, resourceful, and you love buying things for yourself that he could never even dream of affording.
it seems like every week you have a new designer bag, dress or pair of shoes. and as much as he enjoys seeing you model them for him, it makes him feel like a piece of shit because he can't offer to foot the bill for you like a good boyfriend should.
so, he has to find other ways to keep you satisfied that don't involve necklaces that cost more money than he's ever laid eyes on in his entire life.
which is how we arrive at the one thing toji fushiguro is unarguably good at: fucking.
not making love, but fucking. (not to say that he doesn't love you, because of course he does! he just also loves to fuck you like he hates you.)
so that's how you find yourself face down ass up on his bed once again, your brand new fancy dress carelessly shoved up to give your boyfriend easier access to your pretty pussy.
he always eats you out like it's the last time he'll ever get to, and maybe for him, it feels like it is. because deep down, he's convinced soon enough you'll realize what a damn loser he is and ditch him for someone with more going for them.
"mmf... so good, toji." you sigh hazily, eyes half-lidded as you succumb to the pleasure he's giving you. toji thinks you always moan so sweetly for him; it'll be a shame if anyone else ever gets to hear it — but he'd be naïve to believe that you'll stick with him forever when you could do infinitely better.
once you reach your inevitable release, you slowly blink at him over your shoulder and ask to return the favour like you always do. but he simply waves you off, grumbling his usual excuse that "you do enough work as it is" and distracting you by rubbing his pudgy cockhead along your folds.
you keen, but reach behind you to gently halt his movements, whispering out a quiet but sincere "i love you. you know that, right?" fuck. how do you always manage to read him so well? it's like you knew exactly what was going through his head and what he needed to hear, too.
toji grunts out some non-committal answer, not willing to let on just how much hearing those words from you affects him. he can tell you mean it, which works to ease his doubts somewhat — but they still linger in the back of his mind.
shaking the thoughts off, he starts to ease himself into your sopping entrance inch by inch, focusing on the heavenly feel of your warm, tight little cunt around him rather than these pesky feelings.
"well, maybe y'shouldn't," toji mutters gruffly as he pulls himself all the way out, only to thrust harshly back in and earn a yelp from your lips in response. "you deserve a lot better than me, dollface."
"well— ah! — i don't want anyone other than you, toji," you huff out, digging your fingers into the softness of the pillow to keep yourself grounded as he starts to pound into you. "and i don't care if you don't have a job. i still love you anyway."
he releases a sound somewhere between a moan and a growl at your words, his speed quickly becoming as ruthless as usual. it's not his fault, really; he just can't hold himself back once he gets inside you. "shit— baby, you can't just say stuff like that." he rasps out.
"why not? it's true." you counter breathlessly.
and it is. because no matter how much of a loser your boyfriend may be, you love him to pieces. oh, and not to mention, you doubt you could find anyone else who fucks you even half as good as he does.
this point is only proved when you both reach your climaxes in record time, collapsing together in a sweaty and sated heap atop the sheets. and with toji's goopy cum slowly drooling out of your abused cunt and his burly arms wrapping around your waist, you think there's nowhere else you'd rather be than in the warm embrace of your loser.
CHOSO KAMO — THE SCIENCE TUTOR!
you first met choso kamo when he was hired by your rich parents to become your science tutor. it was the class you struggled with the most, the one that was ruining your set of perfect grades. and they just couldn't have that!
unfortunately, it didn't quite go the way they expected.
because when you opened the door to be greeted by the sight of the pretty boy standing before you — all fiddly hands, messy black pigtails and dark eyes staring down at his chunky boots, you knew you just had to have him.
and have him you did.
the two of you have been dating for a few weeks now, but to your surprise, choso hasn't tried to initiate anything with you past kissing. i mean, you knew he was a little shy, but you figured he'd be eager to get into your pants given the way he looks at you when he thinks you aren't paying attention.
when you finally decide to ask him about it, his cheeks flush an adorable shade of pink, and he blinks owlishly at you for a good few moments before he manages to gather the courage to stammer out a reply. "i-i haven't... i've never—"
"—oh. i get it. are you a virgin, cho?"
choso nods almost shamefully, nervously tugging at the sleeves of his shirt as he avoids making direct eye contact with you. the reason he hasn't tried going all the way with you isn't for the lack of desire to, but rather because he fears he won't be good enough for you.
i mean, you're you. so... pretty, perfect and undoubtedly an expert at this sort of thing. whereas choso's never even touched another person before. what if you're put off by his inexperience? or worse, what if you break up with him because of it?
"hey. calm down, baby," you coo softly, reaching out to take both of his clammy hands in yours and giving them a comforting squeeze. "i don't care if you've never had sex before."
choso's eyes widen comically at this, his head snapping back up to check your expression for any sign of deception. but when he doesn't find any, his shoulders sag slightly in relief and he releases a breath he didn't realize he had been holding since this conversation began. "o-oh, okay. that's good."
you smile warmly, running the tips of your fingers over his sweaty palms and admiring the way goosebumps visibly start rising just below the sleeves of his shirt as a result. "if you don't wanna go that far yet, we don't have—"
"no!" choso practically yelps, the blush spreading down his pale neck as he realizes just how desperate he must sound. god, he's such a loser. he has no idea why you even like him, but he isn't about to start complaining anytime soon. "i-i wanna go that far today. with you."
your oversensitive boyfriend ends up cumming twice from just your hand; once from a single press of your thumb against his leaking tip, the other from just a few pumps of your fist. he apologizes profusely each time even though you repeatedly assure him that it was supposed to happen.
it takes you a while to fully sink down onto his lap, the size of his cock just monstrous compared to the rest of his fairly scrawny body. you guess that old saying about quiet boys having the biggest dicks does has some truth to it after all.
choso lets out a strangled mewl once your hips become flush with his, and it isn't long before he's rutting up into you like an animal in heat, as if he isn't even in control of his own body's movements anymore.
the first time he orgasms, he fills your little pussy to the brim with so much of his milky cum that a lot of it leaks out and coats his girthy base in a lewd, glossy ring. but the second, third and fourth times he orgasms? he's shooting blanks.
he's so overstimulated by now that his cock is aching almost painfully, but he can't stop yet — because he still hasn't managed to make you reach even a single climax of your own because he keeps cumming after just a few thrusts into your snug cunt.
eventually, with you guiding him how to hold your hips and bounce your pliant body on his lap just right, you end up falling apart on top of him. choso finds the mere sight so beautiful that it somehow manages to make his needy cock harden inside of you all over again.
and when he whimpers out "can you do that for me again, pretty girl? please?" you realize that maybe dating a loserboy was the best possible choice you could've made.
RYOMEN SUKUNA — THE DEADBEAT STONER!
ryomen sukuna is the biggest loser you've ever met. (and he's also your boyfriend.)
it happened quite unconventionally — when you met him, he was a drug dealer, and your relationship began with you occasionally buying weed from him. but over time, it turned into 'a plug and his favourite customer who frequently hookup together at his shitty apartment.'
and while he may have a pretty pathetic lifestyle, there's no denying how attractive this man is, with his messy pink hair and strangely alluring dark tattoos. oh, and his dick game? legendary.
you could never quite stop yourself from falling back into his bed over and over again, until the walls of your pussy probably remembered the outline of every curve and vein of his cock from the amount of times it had been in there.
eventually, the two of you decided to make it official. sukuna actually ended up quitting his job as a plug so he could spend more time with you, though that doesn't mean he quit the drugs, of course.
he's smoking a joint right now as he watches you grind against his lap, his crimson gaze half-lidded as the pleasant high washes over him. his burly arms are resting leisurely behind his head, visibly not giving a damn about helping you out.
"ryooo," you huff with a pout pushing at your lower lip, your weak hips unable to build up enough friction to make yourself feel pleasurable on your own. you've lost track of what round this is by now, but your body is definitely too exhausted to properly bounce on his cock right now. "help me. please?"
sukuna huffs deeply as if this is the most inconvenienced he's been all day, but nevertheless wraps a lazy hand around the side of your hip to guide you up and down his length. "tch. damn girl, can't even ride me right. should see if one of my old customers can do better."
"you dick!" you gasp dramatically, clutching a hand over your heart in a display of theatrical betrayal. you move to pull yourself off of his lap, but his strong hand effortlessly keeps you anchored in place.
"calm down, baby," sukuna grumbles with a roll of his eyes, but his upper lip twitches slightly in subtle amusement that you know him too well to miss. "y'know i'm just kidding. none of 'em could take me better than you do."
at this, you smile a little, not resisting when he starts to guide your body into a steady rhythm again. sukuna always tends to accidentally say sweet things to you when he's high and then proceeds to deny them the next morning — tonight is clearly no exception.
"yeah, yeahhh," he groans as you start to move on your own at the pace he set, throwing his head back in bliss from both the drugs and the feel of your heavenly cunt dragging up and down against his cock. "jus' like that, pretty."
it's not long before you're both falling apart for the umpteenth time tonight, and sukuna puts out the shrivelled up blunt on the bedside table before carelessly tossing the rolled paper over his shoulder and flipping your spent body around so you're splayed beneath him.
"weed has a shitty aftertaste," he mutters under his breath, easily spreading your still-trembling legs and making room for himself between them as he looks up at you with a wicked grin. "needa wash my mouth out with somethin' sweet."
ryomen sukuna may be a complete loser, but you'll be damned if dating him doesn't have its perks.
© 2024 SUGOROO. please don't copy or translate any of my works without my explicit permission. all rights are reserved to me.
LIKES AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!
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